Brave

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This is my favorite definition of bravery. “The ability to look fear and hurt in the face and say ‘move aside. You are in the way.’” 

I want to be brave. I want my kids to be brave. I want them to do courageous things even when they are scared and riddled with doubt and anxiety. My wish for them is that they always know they were put here on purpose and for a purpose. There are no accidents or mistakes here.

The times in my life during which I have experienced the most formidable amount of fear and anxiety have also been the times in which I’ve grown the most and transformed into a better version of myself. Needless to say, as we press forward toward adoption, fear and anxiety have had a backstage pass to my life these days. It’s overwhelming.

Taking on foster care was the bravest thing I’ve done. Adopting even braver. These kids have changed me. My purpose. My priorities. Everything.

I’m hearing all sorts of whispers of fear in my life right now. “This is only going to get harder.” “Once the adoption happens, all doors to support will be closed.” “You’re going to be legally responsible for their actions.” “Can you really do this?” “They are damaged – they will never be whole. You can’t fix this.” “If a recession hits, do you really think you’ll be able to financially provide the life they deserve?” “Say goodbye to your marriage… it’ll be splitsville by the time they are in middle school.” “You’ll be working for the rest of your life.”

Brave is my word this season. It has my focus. My attention. My mantra so to speak. A few of my current nightstand reads: Brave Enough by Cheryl Strayed, 100 Days to Brave by Annie F. Downs, The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant, and I am Malala by Christina Lamb and Malala Yousafzai. If you’re looking for some inspiration, I recommend any of these (note: the book 100 Days to Brave is a devotional type read and may not be your cup of tea depending on beliefs. 👌🏼 No judgment here!). One thing I’m learning as I focus on “Brave” this season is that there are no regrets. That it’s okay – normal even – to feel scared. It’s not without fear and hurt. That it’s important to strive for progress, not perfection. It’s about letting go – of control, of the ideals around “what I thought my life would look like,” and embracing the uncomfortable unknown. Brave isn’t a feeling but a choice.

Let go and be brave my friends! ✌🏼

“Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous or honest.” – Maya Angelou

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